We’ve updated our Terms of Use to reflect our new entity name and address. You can review the changes here.
We’ve updated our Terms of Use. You can review the changes here.

η​Θ​Ø​5h

by Damian Webb

/
  • Streaming + Download

    The specified work in myriad formats.
    Purchasable with gift card

      name your price

     

  • Cassette + Digital Album

    Alternate Mix, differs from digital version.
    Includes additional music from Jeff Hewitt.

    Renownded for their durability and portability, these quality cassettes will last you as long as they want to.
    ships out within 5 days
    Purchasable with gift card

      $2 USD or more 

     

1.
2.
And then they come for you. -They Come for you. All dressed in fancy leathers -All dressed in fancy leathers Extraditing your unwanted urges to the recesses of your backward mind. It flows through your veins down to your scrotum Makes your scrotum shrivel up like a raisin. Makes your scrotum shrivel up like a raisin. Down to your scrotum Shrivel up like a raisin (rest unintelligable, will be amended later)
3.
(Rock and Rock and roll, but not without good reason. Rock and fuckin' roll, cause, 'tis the fuckin' season) Completely convoluted Cranially Polluted Trading time and sense of self for the honor of stocking a shelf. But oh, the uncountable wealth. Completely Convoluted Cranially Polluted (...) Gonna bring it down to your lowly level. Baby, ooh. Gonna turn up the bass and leave the treble where it is. Broadswords were designed with men in mind. Explain that to me. Peaking Duck, duck, duck goose. I heard you were leavin' I warned you'bout leavin'. I heard you were leavin' I warned you 'bout leavin'.
4.
Vaccuduster 02:54
Shimmy in the doodle-bop Wake wake up Speakeasy, talk hard Talk hard, steal the airwaves Vaccuduster Similar circumstances, yes, but no flaming green eyes Tears of melting butter streaming down a quivering, stony face. Leaving a trail of pimples and pooling in your dimples... Windshield w-w-w-wipeout Bottom cluster Vaccuduster Bottom cluster Bought the bottom, the applebottom I butter my paper I butter my lards Walk the dinosaur, run the mammoth. Walk the dinosaur, baby, run the mammoth. Raking the leaf Raking the hoe Raking the leaf Leafing the rake Bottom cluster Vaccuduster Applebottom Dust the duster The vaccuduster ...When we touch, I feel their ghost carresses; Your belly bloated with their essence and my constant acquiescence...(repeating) Round and round and round and round Gene Krupa was an originator of the Big Band theory Tommy Dorsey was into the big band theory As a matter of fact don't let nothin' hold you back If the Scatman can do it, brotha, so can you Everybody stutters one way or the other So check out my message to you As a matter of fact, don't let nothing hold you back If the Scatman can do it, brotha, so can you I'm the Scatman (scatting)
5.
Oh, marrionnette. I'm a marionette. They got this attache case. They got this attache case. A B C D E F G and all the other letters are coming after me The attache case, they got this attache case They're putting it into a file. They look at it after a while. They got the sneeze and They got the breeze and They got this attache case The attache case The attache case The attache case is handcuffed to them. The sneeze, in the ass. I put my head in the trashcan. I wake up, I put my head in the trashcan.
6.
The weaker sex is the kind you forget. Melon ballers make all the poor melons jealous. That doesn't make you special. No, not quite special. Just speck. A tiny speck. Speck as in speculation R E S P E C ulation R E S P E C ulation Older rhymes with bolder Like the rock and also the way of acting You know, acting. Pretending I'll listen to this when I'm older and think What was I thinking Well, I'm already older now and I sure don't know But I could tell you one thing Yeah, I could tell you one thing But I decided to tell you several Because I got time to tell you several I dare you to think of something that rhymes with several Uh, level? Psh, no. Uh, Cape Caneverel? {sic} Did you really think you could slip that by me? Oh, I'm stumped. Yeah, so's George Washington's dad's cherry tree! But I don't see him crying about it. No, you don't see him crying about it. I wonder if, uh, in the old days...the town cryer, y'know? If he was the sensitive type... Yeah, girls like that. Psh, bullshit. Anyway, sensitive..you know... would he feel self conscious about crying about stuff? Since he was the town cryer? Maybe that's how you become the town cryer in the first place. Like they see you sitting around crying at the local pub or what have you and then they're all like "hey, you're such a baby. You should be the town cryer!" Yeah, yeah and then he's all like, "Well I could use the extra income." Yeah, "Plus I hate being home, 'cause my wife's always throwing dictionaries at me and shit." Busts of Beethoven ----------------- Or Rachmaninoff. Are you talking about that Jamaican rock band... "Rock, Mon...Enough"?
7.
Digit Baby 03:29
High five on that one, High five Police Navidad Police Navidad They'll blow your brains out and then you'll be no good. A guy in a hat...what do you think about that? Don't look now...or you're gonna see me. Scratch yourself with a digit baby Ooooh Not tired or nothing Not tired of nothing Don't look now, or you're gonna see me. Scratch yourself with a digit baby, oooh.
8.
OStritch Egg 01:31
You will say, "I guess". This was a man that you had hoped you would get involved with. He had been sending wave after wave of his misogynistic proteges after you for quite a while now. It had been pissing you off and you really wanted a chance to show him what was really what; Scramble his shit all up, like a big ostritch egg. You'd make him spin and spin. You knew exactly what to say when you met him. What you said at that point would start him spinning and every word after that would be fingertips drug across the side of him, to continue his revolving around the axis. The axis being your erect left nipple. In spite of your excitement the right is completely soft, being kept warm in the center of his palm.
9.
10.
11.
Ok, so we're on some kind of a date Watching some tennis-related, love-suspense-snoozefest Just like in real life, there's no sign of love anywhere. Not even in her eyes, which only set on me when they absolutely have to. Movie gets OK at the end. Guy gets his hand crushed under a boulder By whoever, the bad guy, I guess. He starts to almost kill them, but the other dude just fucking rips his hand off to get free of the boulder and they do battle, etcetera. Something about the girls father possibly being behind it all, whatever. Anyway, then we're walking around after this movie and I'm trying to make small talk about how tall this nearby building is and "wouldn't it suck to be falling the length of it" or some such bullshit and I'm trying real hard to close the distance, but I can't tell if it's working. All of a sudden, a handful of clearly-devolved prep-type couples walks up the stairs beside us just as I'm finally getting her to submit to a somewhat-loving, kinda-caress-type-hug. Her head quite noticeably turns around on my shoulder and even all the way around my head to watch these people pass. Eventually she breaks with me and follows after them. I follow shortly thereafter, thinking, "What if I'm about to walk in here and see her doing something ungraceful; Whorish, even?" Well, just a few short steps tell me I needn't bother with the 'what if?'s or the benefit of any doubts, because she's riding a collapsible TV tray in a very provocative manner. Then... Blah blah blah... Not even begging her to let me get a word in edgewise works. As if that was any different than it always is. I finally get her to stop yapping long enough to say, "Imagine my disappointment" and then she walked off, what was presumably, the face of the earth. Or something similar. Everywhere there were these horrible little bugs. Big for bugs, really; with these long hooking tails or stingers coming out of them. They'd get all over you and under your clothes and ceaselessly, subtly poke you. Insofar as I could gather, they didn't break the skin. They'd just wrap all up in the fibers of a sock and poke poke poke. I was picking them out of my clothes, in the dark for hours When I noticed some large tears in one of the sliding screen doors. I thought, "I have to fix this. But if I put duct tape over it, I might lose my deposit. Then again, do I even live here?" I look at my back in two mirrors and see another one in my shirt. It was more disgusting, than anything else.

about

Scatterbrained and frantic recollections, awkward puns bouncing off of one another, wryly recounted dreams sprinkled across waves off shrieking noise and walls of bass tones. Stephen Hawking with a British accent. A searing 28-or-so-minutes of edge-of-your-seat boredom and textbook confusion. An album which happily fails at posing the question of a whether or not a new genre would be desirable.

credits

released July 25, 2010

Damian Alexander Webb

license

all rights reserved

tags

about

Damian Webb California

Musician
From California

contact / help

Contact Damian Webb

Streaming and
Download help

Redeem code

Report this album or account

Damian Webb recommends:

If you like Damian Webb, you may also like: